Community Rainbow Waves

I had been holding my breath for so long, and I needed to exhale at one point or another, or I would explode from holding it in.

I’ve had crushes on girls for as long as I can remember. Never made much of it, figured it was “normal”. Thought maybe it was just because I admired them and wanted to be them, or that it was a typical part of growing up.

In high school, I had crushes on boys and girls. I didn’t know much about anything back then, so I figured it was just a phase and one side would fade and disappear over time. That I was just figuring myself out and, one day, one side would win.
Since all I knew that existed was either gay or straight, it had to be one or the other, right?

I always hoped I would end up being only into boys, so that I could be “normal”. I wanted to be normal more than anything in this world.
My whole life, I had never fit in at all. With anyone, or anywhere. So I needed to at least be “normal” for one freaking thing, you know what I mean?

But then in college… I mean, classic story I guess, I fell for my straight female best friend. It didn’t go anywhere, but because at the time the only representation of bisexuality was the toxic version I had seen in the media, as well as the horrible things people would say about bisexuals, I decided to bury my attraction to guys.
I could NOT be bi… I’d rather be gay than bi. The examples I had seen were evil and toxic, and I just couldn’t be like them. There was no way. Absolutely no way. Never. Nope.

So I did everything I could to bury that side of me.
I would be so mean to myself.
…Fear and shame can make you think terrible words and do terrible things.

After a while, still in college, I ended up coming out as a lesbian. I hoped that by saying it, it would make it real. That it would erase the other part I didn’t want to think about.
I came out online to my classmates, after testing the waters for a while, trying to see if they would be accepting or not.

It was mostly fine. The more religious ones would often remind me that I would be going to hell for it, but apart from that it was great and the guys invited me to hang out with them. That was fun 🙂

Some time later, I came out to my parents through a letter I left in a place I knew they’d see it.

I was absolutely terrified they would kick me out.

The thing is… I come from a really judgmental family. My mum is very religious, but I’ve also heard a lot of racist and homophobic things growing up. And that’s just a tiny part of the range of judging comments I’ve heard all my life.

I’ve never been close to my family.
Discussions have never been a thing.
Disagreements mean either silence or terrible fights. Or both.

So I had no idea how that would turn out, but I felt like I needed to do it, if only to stop hearing “when are you gonna get a boyfriend?” that always tore me up inside.

I couldn’t breathe. I had been holding my breath for so long, and I needed to exhale at one point or another, or I would explode from holding it in.

Fortunately, in the end it was okay. I mean, at least they didn’t kick me out.

The “conversation” lasted for about 2 minutes, max, and then we never spoke about it again. (Except for the “maybe it’s just a phase” that I got a few times over the early years.)

That was around… 2004 I think?

Then once, in a birthday message a few years ago, my mum mentioned that she hoped I would find a woman I could be happy with. But that’s pretty much it. (And even today, I still hear homophobic things sometimes when I visit, if there’s something on TV about our beautiful community.)

Some time after I came out to my parents, I came out by email to most of my extended family. Again, I’ve never been close to anyone, and it’s always been easier for me to write than speak, so that’s how I chose to do it.
As far as I know, they’re all accepting. The ones I’ve told, anyway. But for other reasons, I stopped seeing them around that time, so who knows, really.

But to this day, except my godmother who I told recently when the topic came up, they all still think I’m gay.
Since emotionally I’ve only fallen for women, I didn’t want my parents to start hoping I would end up with a man when I don’t see it ever happening.

I mean, I’m pansexual, so I could end up with anyone I connect with no matter their gender, but… I’ve fallen for 3 women so far. No one else.

When I find “the one”, I want to finally feel safe using my chosen label. But until then, I feel safer just not talking about it around my parents.

But speaking of pansexuality… At some point I decided that no matter what society thought about bisexuality, I was only hurting myself by trying to fight who I was.
And then I heard about pansexuality, and it was the first label that I really connected with. The definition made so much sense to me, and it just felt right.

The puzzle pieces finally clicked into place. Falling for someone’s soul, regardless of their gender, regardless of their genitalia, made all the sense in the world to me.
And by learning about the different labels, by finding great people who identified as them, I started to really accept myself and eventually started to love this part of me.

I mean… I’m just me, you know? 🙂

I’m also out in my workplace now. Took me years and for an openly gay man to be hired for me to feel safe enough to do it, but it’s done. Haven’t had any problems so far.

And I want to believe that I would also be open if I ever got a different job.

I can’t go back to hiding. I need to breathe.
Now that I know how great and freeing it feels to have air moving through my lungs, I don’t want to hide this huge part of who I am.

And today, well… I’m just fighting for better representation. And for bisexuality and pansexuality to be seen in a better light (and to be seen, period), so that the next generations don’t have to feel all the shame I’ve felt back when I was still figuring it out.

Labels or no labels, people should have access to amazing examples of every shade of our beautiful and colourful rainbow, so they can find a place to fit in somewhere along the way.

I’m convinced that love is stronger than everything else, so… I do believe that one day love will truly win.

And what a world this will be. x

In the end we only regret the chances we didn’t take.

I knew I was a part of the LGBTQ+ community when I was 13 and met my best friend. My best friend is genderqueer and showed me what the LGBTQ+ community is. At first, I was amazed that I had spent so much of my life not knowing about this fantastic community but then, I got to thinking what if I’m a part of the LGBTQ+ community? So being the person that I am, I spent hours upon hours of researching and learning everything I could about the LGBTQ+ community. And after learning and researching until my brain felt like it was going to die, I came to the conclusion I was bisexual. The next day I came out to my best friend and she was accepting. I then proceeded for the next couple of months to come out to friends; they all were accepting. In late December of 2018, I came out to my parents as a lesbian. I didn’t come out to them as bisexual because I knew deep down I was lesbian. Nonetheless, my parents are accepting of my sexuality. The next day I came out to my brother, and he was accepting and then later that day came out as gay to me and my parents; my parents are accepting of his sexuality as well. I then spent the next year coming out to my aunts, uncles, and cousins; and they all are accepting of my sexuality. Overall, I am just so grateful to have an accepting family and friends that I can truly be myself around. I couldn’t ask for a better coming out story.

My name is Tracy, and I am me.

It is only when I look back that things really become clear. For example, it is obvious now why I had a crush on my P.E teacher (but then who didn’t!). But at the time I was just a confused teenager trying to make sense of all that I was feeling. I guess that is the same for everybody when they first become aware of themselves as sexual beings, regardless of their sexuality. I don’t know how old I was, I’m guessing around 15? There was a Lesbian couple living opposite my family home, and I remember asking myself if I was like them, but then thinking that even if I was, I wouldn’t know what to do about it. This was the early 1980s, and things were not socially like they are now.

I left school in 1984 at the age of 17, got a job, and was happy just being me. I had no desire to meet anybody but I was aware that getting a boyfriend was the next thing on the list of things that were expected of me by society. I must add here that no pressure came from my family. So I conformed, and had a couple of boyfriends over the next couple of years. Looking back I actually feel sorry for them, they clearly wanted more than I was willing to give. Subconsciously I would never put myself in a position with them where things could progress physically. To me, they were friends who just happen to be male – simple. That’s why they never stuck around long I’m guessing.

Then in 1987 I started my Nurse training in the NHS. Six months into my course and my path crossed with another student who was to become my first girlfriend. We started out as friends. I knew she was gay, she never hid it. But I still wasn’t out, even to myself. Over time though the penny finally dropped and we got closer and closer. She would go on to say that she was just waiting for me to realise for myself, she apparently knew already.
That was when I started living the double life that will be familiar to a lot of people reading this. Luckily I was living at the hospital in nurses accommodation. It certainly made it easier, but hiding this part of me from my family didn’t feel right. My girlfriend, even though 7 years older than me, was also not out to her parents, which in a way made it easier for me to take the easy way out and keep my sexuality hidden from everyone but her.
Around the same time, when my world was rapidly changing around me, my sister passed way from Leukaemia. She was 36 years old and had only been ill for a few months before she died. My Father had died a couple years before this, and then for my sister to die….. I don’t know how my Mother and family (I am the youngest of 5 children) got through it, but we did. As for me, I didn’t want to add to the mix by coming out, so I stayed very firmly in. I can’t in all honesty say that had my sister not died I would have come out because I don’t know. Maybe it was just another reason for me to take the easy way out.

Life settled down, and I was happy, but still living a double life. I kind of found it exciting in the beginning, but as I got older, it became tiring. My girlfriend was accepted into my family, as I was into hers, but nothing was ever said. The more time that passed the harder it got to think about coming out. As it turns out, our families had guessed anyway and were happy for us. They were just waiting for us to say something. We didn’t know this at the time however.

In 2000 the unimaginable happened. My Mother passed away. And for me, devastated as I was I knew the time had come, there was no more procrastinating , I had to come out to my brothers and sister. I was 33 years old, and my girlfriend and I had been together for years. Even then, the thing that made my mind up once and for all, was that I wanted my girlfriend to travel in the funeral car with the husband and wives of my siblings. I remember the exact moment. The others were downstairs in my mother’s house and my girlfriend and I were upstairs talking. My sister-in-law then came and joined us. We chatted about other things to start, then I simply said that my girlfriend and I were a couple, and that I wanted her to travel in the family car behind my mother’s coffin.

That was it. I was out. The relief was immense, but mixed with nerves and grief for my mother. All my Sister-in-law said was “Well about damn time” and hugged me, before going back downstairs where she was of course going to tell the others.
A short time later my girlfriend and I also went downstairs. All my family were in the garden, and when I stepped out there to join them I was mobbed. I found myself in the middle of a huge group hug filled with love and reassurance. It was such a surreal time, grief for my mother, together with the relief of coming out and being accepted by my family.

There was only one negative. After the funeral, my sister’s husband came up to me. I had only seen him a couple of times since my sister passed away a few years earlier, and he said something along the lines of “There’s my perverted sister-in-law”. I’m not sure if he was serious or if he thought he was being funny, either way it wasn’t the time or the place, and he was dragged away by one of my brothers and told to go home.

And that is my coming out story.

The relationship I was in then came to an end after just over 17 years together. However, I am now married to an amazing woman, my real soulmate, we’ve been together for 11 years. I sometimes think my family like her more than me.

I am now 53 years old and I only have two regrets in life. The first is that I never allowed my dear Mum to know the real me, because I was scared to come out to her, and the second is that my Wife never met her. Or my Sister. Or my Brother who also died from Leukaemia 14 years ago.

Apart from that, life is wonderful.

Carol S

I realized that I was different since I was little, when I fell in love with my roommate at age 7. Of course, I didn’t understand what that meant, but I knew I had something different. I grew up and my look to my friends was different from the look to my friends. When I got to the age to understand what was happening I repressed all this feeling. I started kissing the boys, buying posters of beautiful actors, talking about boys, trying to make me believe that I was not a lesbian. Because for the society in my time (today I am 37 years old), I was much more prejudiced, and still had my family, especially my mother, religious and very attached to children. I was afraid of hurting her.
At 15 I had my first homosexual experience. I kissed a girl. It was so strange, confusing but, at the same time, great. At that moment I realized that what I felt was for real! However, I still didn’t have the courage to take on myself or others! It was then that I plunged into religion! I participated in celebrations, prayer groups, youth groups, retreats, etc., to try to hide, oppress what I felt. It was a very big internal conflict, I suffered a lot at that time. Then I started to date a boy. It was only 6 months, then a girl appeared with whom I fell madly in love. I couldn’t resist! I stopped fighting a war that was already lost but I didn’t want to lose. I ended my relationship and we got involved. It was 4 wonderful years. Not so much with my mother! One day I went out to find my girlfriend and my mother went after me. I got a huge scare. She asked me if I liked women, I didn’t have the courage to say yes and said no. Until one day she asked me again and my heart filled with courage and I said yes. She said that I had not chosen to be a lesbian, that I simply felt attracted to women. That I did not want and never wanted to make her suffer.
At first it was very difficult, but little by little she realized how happy I was, how happy I am. I earned her and everyone in my family’s respect with great honor, dignity, wisdom and character. I love who I am and I don’t give up being happy to the detriment of anyone else!

I am a Gender-Fluid Queer

My story is one that never ends, its an endless cyclone of fear and misery, a tale is old as time. Living in a religious Hispanic household restricted me from, well.. being anyone i wanted to be. Being the youngest of seven siblings i didn’t have much choice in the matter when it came to expressing my true self, at an early age i knew i was different. Well so did my favorite Aunt, she was more of a mother to me then my actual one, she looked after me when my parents were away for years working in the city. But my first coming out story began in the summer of ’04, when something inside me awakened. I couldn’t turn to my family with it in fear of instant rejection or judgement or even isolating me from the world, so to practice I told a lie to my best friend at the time to see her reaction to the news, i said ” i was playing with the girl next door and some how we ended up kissing, I didn’t know how I felt about it but I might try it again, what do you think?” her response was priceless, she asked if I was gay now, I said no of course not I’ve had boyfriends in the past, she went on to say its ok if you are, just live your life ill support you and what every you decide. Now mind you we were like 9 years old, they stuck to me. from then on, I became a little more confident and bolder in my social surrounding such as school and eventually work. until one day my aunt asked me, “Kay do you like girls?” I was utterly shocked, for I thought no member in my family suspected it, I turned red with embarrassment first rejecting the question, but I looked at my Aunts face which showed nothing but kindness and I finally had that courage and said it out loud YES! An honest to goodness Wave of relief washed over me I felt flushed, but she said shes always known but waited for me to come to her but my fear was too deep she knew I never would. We sat up that whole night talking about every minut detail, she helped me feel accepted, loved and supported. I became a little bolder a few days later my older sister called me to ask if I was Gay I said I was a lesbian yes, but being called gay or lesbian never sat right with me I mean I like girls so being called lesbian insinuated I was only female, I knew I was born a girl but I also liked when strangers would mistake me for a boy, so i sot the advice and consul of others like me to put a name to who I was as a person, coming across label as “Gender-Fluid Queer” it described me to the “T” so thats how i described myself to my brothers and friends and yea stranger to if asked. Now the dark part of all this, my dearest loving Aunt passed, and my father left us, I was left with the one person I was most terrified of. My religious headstrong Mother, I alone watch over her none of my siblings want nothing to do with her I am all she has, til this day she still does not know or is in denial. She is now a fragile woman, so in fear of hurting her I say nothing, cowardly I know, I’ve tried many times over they years to tell her but just when I finally think I have the nerve to fess up , I chicken out. Its a fear that paralyzes me from having a social life anymore, going out on dates or meeting anyone. I’ve lived with this weight on my chest for 20 years, so to take care of me and separate myself from her negativity I have taken up therapy to cope with this weight. Hopefully in due time I can work on my true authentic self and have the courage to tell her as I’ve done many times over!

Hopefully you can find a silver lining in my story and if you have a similar story just know your not alone!
Thank you for reading
Much Love!

Proud Bisexual

I knew when I was a freshman in high school. I was in love with my best friend. We never tried a relationship. I was torn. It was a hard process for family acceptance. It’s been a constant struggle. I continue to be out and proud and love who I love. I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 2 years. It’s my first same sex relationship. We’re slowly coming out to everyone and being proud of who we’re with.

Caitlin

I was always very feminist and had a lot of female role models. I would be very into specific actresses and just chalk it up to wanting to be their friend, or look like them, or love their personality, etc. It never really fell into that “I want to be /with/ them” category. I never thought anything of it. I was on Tumblr and everyone was that way, and no one was gay (at the time, now we’re all LGBTQ+ but that’s neither here nor there) that was doing it so it just seemed pretty “regular”!

I’ve always been pretty introverted and had anxiety, so add those things together you don’t really venture outside of comfort zones too often! I dated a few guys in high school but that was high school and who really knows what they’re doing anyway, right? After some less than ideal “boyfriends” I went into college single and definitely not looking for anything except an education. I made a good group of friends and we went out fairly regularly. My friends were always asking “are you gay? I never see you flirt with anyone.” I’d always said no, not because I was ashamed but because I really didn’t know. It’s a scary thing to dig into yourself and really question things about who you fundamentally are. It’s even scarier to go in and admit that you’re any type of “other”.

I started to really wonder about my sexually my senior year of college. I was nearing the end of my studies and being a psychology major all you really do is introspective work. I was taking a lot of gender/sexuality classes and in writing all these papers and researching all these things I started to really wonder, what if I’m not into men because I’m /not into/ men. Huh, who would have thought! I started watching more tv shows and movies that gay characters (Orphan Black, South of Nowhere, The L Word, etc) and I felt connected to them. I could feel that tingling in the pit of your stomach when 2 women would kiss on screen. I never felt that when I watched straight couples, or when I kissed men. So when I went out to bars with my friends I would be more open to just realizing that women are great and sometimes they flirt with you and you flirt back! And it’s not so scary.

After realizing I was definitely not straight I had been asked out on a date with a woman but I was worried because I hadn’t actually told anyone I was gay. I just, wanted to be. Why do I have to “come out”? Why can’t I just be like “this is my girlfriend” and we all move on. These are the annoyances I still feel. Because even though I’m 29 I come out every time I meet someone new. It’s always different but it’s always coming out. It’s always that moment of fear from when the word “girlfriend” leaves your lips to the moment the person you’re speaking to actually says something that you fear what they will say. No matter how comfortable YOU are with your sexuality you have to make sure those around you are okay with it to. And that blows. Anywho – I could talk about that for years so I’ll move on – I decided to come out to my family on my 22nd birthday because who could be mad at someone on their birthday? I was sitting at the table with my mom and dad and waiting for my sibling to arrive and I was nervous AF. My parents have always supported me in everything I had done and I knew this would probably be the same but that fear is real and it doesn’t matter how nonsensical it is, it’s SCARY. So I blurted out “I think I want to date women”. And then I had to backtrack and tell them that I’ve been thinking about a lot of things and I’m pretty sure I’m gay. They were supportive and by the time my brother showed up for dinner they were already joking about things with me. My dad was encouraging me to ask out a cute bartender and my mom was embarrassed to be at the table with us. Business as usual! I still struggle to really find the “box” that fits me, I like the term Gay because it’s all encompassing. For me Queer has always felt… Not me, and I don’t want to be called Queer, but I know others feel that way about Gay! I don’t quite feel like a lesbian because I do sometimes find men attractive, but bisexual doesn’t really fit either. I’m somewhere on the Kinsey scale and “gay” hits the nail on the head for me. Anywho, that’s me.

I know that my story is definitely on the more rare side of being accepted by family with such ease and I hope that as time goes on the stories like mine get more regular and the ones where parents react badly become the odd ones. I know that’s where we’re headed as a society and I can’t wait to get to that place.

Just remember the most important thing, if your given family doesn’t support you, turn to your chosen family because they will. You always have support whether it’s virtually through places like this or real life framily (thanks, Sophia Bush for the best term, friends/family = Framily!), lean on your people when you need to that’s what we’re meant to do. You are not now, nor will you ever be alone.

I really can´t…identify myself…but it´s okay I think!

First of all, my first language is german.. so if i make mistakes (and there will be many I suppose) i apologize!

I want to make it short: I´ve never felt as a woman and I´ve never felt as a guy. i don´t know, I mean, it´s not important for me. biological i´m a woman, yes, and if you would see me you would also say that i´m a woman- but i don´t feel it-i like unisex clothes, sometimes i watch soccer and shout and drink beer, the next day i watch a walt disney film and cry- i´ve never liked or was even interested in things most girls like and also in things most guys like- as a kid or teenager i felt like an alien, now i´m happy the way iam. i don´t like the expectation society has on women- so what, yes im biological a woman, yes i don´t want kids, no also not in ten years, no i´m not married to a guy, blabla..

my coming out was a difficult- i always knew that i like women. i´ve never, and i´m 33 years old now- had feelings for men- maybe i fall in love with a guy when i´m a granny, who knows, but it never happened to me.
when my family found out (for me, it was always okay and normal) my parents throw me out of the house- i was 17. i had nothing, i didnt know what to do with my life, there was no perspective.
because i had to switch my places to sleep (mostly sofas of friends, we were young, not many of us had an own apartement or something like this)
i couldn´t concentrate on learning, doing my school etc… so i also lost the oppurtunity to do my final exams in school.
i had many difficult years, and i was so young…when i think back now, there was too much alcohol, too many parties and too many risky situations.

it all sounds very sad, and heartbreaking, but you know what?
I´m married know, to a wonderful woman, i finished university and i´m a social worker now- and try to help people manage their lives. in the past i always wished to have a social worker who helps me- now i try to be the person for other people.
so, there´s a happy end, i had good people in my life and i always trusted in myself- maybe i was just lucky, who knows 😉

YJT, Taiwan

I’d love to start with the reflection on Dom’s inspiring story. I’m not sure if it’s appropriate … I just want to say that Dom has almost expressed what I had in my mind in the past few years ever since I started dating girls. I come from a family that seems “democratic,” as my parents always put it, but to me, in some way, my family is quite conservative. I don’t blame them. Actually, at first, I blame myself because I’ve tried to live up to my parents’ expectations through my life. I don’t want them to see me differently, ’cause I’m too afraid to look into those eyes, as if telling me that I did something wrong or trying to show me that I just lost myself, got bad friends… you’ll find a better life after you pull yourself back to the “normal” part of the world…something like that. Also, my parents care so much about their reputation and afraid that if there’s “rumors,” our life might be affected in a way they don’t expect. And I can’t bear to see their hurtful expressions. So I just couldn’t…
Nonetheless, after reading Dom’s story, I suddenly felt energized by courage and hopes. The positive values Dom’ shared were mostly what I tried to share with people in my everyday life. And I couldn’t be happier to see people sharing the same positive values, causing positive ripples, since positivity is one of my core values.
So here I am to share my story… even though I haven’t come out to my parents, but I know some day I will…

To most of my friends, I’m the kind of person who brings them joy and be there when they need someone to talk to or rely on. I love to see people smile, laugh, their happy faces, even though I might not be the reason. But anyway, I truly enjoy the moment bringing happiness to others and sharing positivity.
I’m the kind of person who reflects on myself almost anytime, anywhere, especially on the emotional and mental part since I’m kind of a good observer in people’s emotions. I tend to observe people’s expression, gestures, and emotions, whether stranger or not. Then I would start to wonder what caused the emotion. Maybe out of curiosity, or maybe it’s just for the reminder for me to be a better self.
About more than half a year ago, I ended a four-year unhealthy relationship with a woman. Along the way in the relationship, I kept reflecting on the life we lived and the values we shared. It turned out that it just couldn’t work out. But it’s okay. Every argument, every breakdown has led me to see what matters most to me. Even though it’s kind of the hardest moment in my life so far, I’m still working hard to gather myself together while at the same time enjoying bring joys to people around me, for happiness is my motivation to move forward.
After the end of the relationship, the sudden emptiness struck me, which gave me plenty of time on introspection. So I started to contemplate the life I lived in the almost past 30 years (yeah I’m about to turn 30 in April), if I could remember. In the past, like Dom said in her story, I focused on boys, without realizing I’m also attracted to girls. I know I enjoy being close friends with them, but what I didn’t know is that they did attract me. I remembered clearly when my high school classmate, a boy I think I adore at that time, asked me if I was into some girl in our class; I denied firmly and felt hurt. I was so afraid to be labeled as weirdo or someone that doesn’t fit into the mainstream and also afraid of not going to get a boyfriend on the thought of people might think I’m into women. I didn’t know what I really like or want back then.
Now I know, I just want to be someone that can love freely, whether boys or girls, what matters most is I’m true to myself, to my heart. I just want to enjoy my everyday life, make my life as colorful as possible, for I don’t want to have regrets.
I enjoy being myself, no matter when, especially the sincerity people feel in me when we get along. I enjoy helping others, not to expect anything in return, but a happy smile on their face can make my day. 🙂 I enjoy living a colorful life and cherish every happy moment. As Dom said, “When we’re happy, we shine.” I’d like to shine as brightly as I can and bring happiness and share positivity to those I meet. Let’s shine together!

A Penguin.

Ok, firstly I have to say that my English is not very good. So I’m sorry if I make some grammar mistakes. How should I start? I would identify myself as a penguin, well, a half one. I like them because of their loyalty. They choose a partner and they will be with them forever. They also have another quality that it is constancy and I’m not a very constant person but I will work on it. I know all these things because of Atypical. It’s a series tv and you guys(can I call you guys?) should give it a go. I’m not gonna tell you anything because I don’t wanna spoiler but I’m gonna tell you one thing: it’s worth it to spend some hours to watch it. It’s really educational and also catchy.
So…you are now wondering how I figured out me being part of the LGBTQ2IA+ community. When I was attending middle school(maybe the first year or the second one, I don’t remember) I had this huge crush on my friend, who was and is a girl. Like, I thought I was really in love with her because she wouldn’t leave my mind alone. My brain was filled with her and that made me realize, not right away but with the time, that I like girls. I never told her my true feelings but things went weird with her because I couldn’t stop staring at her and maybe it made her feel uneasy. I was afraid of this side of me so I tried to hide it. I was frightened of my parent’s reaction if they had discovered my sexuality because they are not very open-minded. But with the years I understood that I shouldn’t feel ashamed of my sexuality so I started coming out with my friends. Slowly but I think it’s a step toward success. I’m really grateful for their understanding and to have them by my side.
I don’t know if I’m able to tell my parents about my sexuality and that I don’t feel comfortable with my biological sex because talking about LGBT stuff is kinda a taboo. I hope that someday they will understand my feelings and still love me if I’m being…me.
Yeah, that was pretty everything I wanted to say. Sorry if it is a bit confusing to follow. I tend to write everything that passes through my mind.
Thank you for reading my little outlet and I hope that everything is ok with your family and friends. I really hope that everything is ok. It’s a difficult situation for everyone but I believe that we’ll get through it.
Also, I wanna thank Dominique Provost-Chalkley because of her I discovered this special place. She’s such an amazing person. She really inspires me and I will never stop loving her.
I don’t know how to finish because I’m very bad at this ah ah. I hope you can be happy and healthy every day of your life and…that’s all. Bye!